Rules:
1. You must answer every question without lying ONCE.
2. At the end, you must tag not one, not two, not three, but FOUR people.
3. Those people you tag must either be sent a note or you have to give them a comment on their page saying "You've been tagged!"
4. At the bottom of the questions, you must answer the very last one (before the one that asks who you tag) with, "I do solemnly swear that I have confessed the truth in all the above questions." Or else you epic!phailed the whole THING! [Epic grammar phæl, I think.]

1) Tell us a little bit about yourself. Gender, age, hobbies?
--14, male, plays the piano, draws a lot (duh), likes to annoy people, wants to stop talking about himself in 3^rd person.

2) Now let's get a little deeper! Do you have a secret crush? Why does she/he attract you, and how do you know him/her?
--No, not yet...

3) Do you prefer men, women, both, or neither?
--Neither. Ufufufu...

4) Are you one of those people who believe the forwarded messages that spam your inbox?
--I don't get any of those. *checks inbox to find previous statement purely, utterly wrong*

5) WHY are you best friends with your best friend?
--He doesn't attack me when I say something abou-- ...wait, what?

6) Do you like where you are in life? Where you're going, where you've been?
--I guess so.

7) Is there anything you'd like to accomplish before you go?
--I dunno what yet, I've only got, liek, 70 years or whatever?

8) How strict are your parents? The annoying kind of strict, or the too loose?
--Así, así; somewhere in the middle.

9) Siblings? If so, how many and do you like them at ALL? If not, do you feel lucky?
--I've got 2, and I wish I didn't.

10) Do you have a favorite book? Or if you don't read books, maybe a magazine?
--Hitchhiker's trilogy

11) Favorite genre of music?
--I'll pass, thx.

12) Song?
--No, just... no.

13) Artist?
--Me! *shot*

14) Water bottle company?
--...the hell?

15) Video game?
--SRB2. Sorry, Sega; even a pixellated WAD-based game can beat what you're coming up with next.

16) 'Nuff of that! Time to roleplay! Now, you're running from the law and are running through the sewers to get to safety. You come to an intersection; one direction is water and the other is cement. You know that if you take the water route, you'll most likely be safer at the end of it, and your scent will be lost by any dogs they're using... but the thought of trudging through that is not pleasant. The cement way is longer, but at the end, a friend is waiting to slip you through a secret passage, and you're more likely to get caught. Which way do you take?
--Water... yeah. I can hold my breath for a while.

17) Your best friend is dangling at the edge of a cliff, right next to your mother. You only have time to save one of them. Which one will you save?
--How did they get there?
--Why don't I have time to save 'em both, but I have time to think about it?
--Why can't one bring the other up with him/her?
--Why do I keep asking stupid questions about other stupid questions?!

18) Your best friend confesses to you that (s)he is madly in love with your boy/girlfriend. What do you do?
--Does she care? 'Cause if she's not in love with you too, you can say that all day.

19) QUICK! I'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY THE SOVIET UNION AND NEED YOUR BANK NUMBER TO GET ENOUGH MONEY SO I CAN BUY MYSELF OUT! GIVE IT TO ME, QUICK, HURRY!!
--Wow. How'd you get yourself into that one?

20) Black cat crosses your path. Your reaction?
--Get the f*ck outta my way! *kick*

21) Is that--GASP--CHRIS BROWN??
--Really.

22) Omg. Ew. Chris Brown. How could you LIKE Chris BROWN?!
--IKNORITE?

23) You just encountered the love of your life kissing a different boy/girl. How do you react?
--Slip something into both of their drinks

24) What do you believe is the purpose of life?
--42

"I do solemnly swear that I have confessed the truth in all the above questions."
--Well, I'm not sure what anyone would gain from lying here, ne?

25) How did you like your answers?
--What's that supposed to mean?

26) Tagging time!